Forget diet planning, I hate diet planning, I am going to buy a juicer instead. Yeah, a nice one.
Specs: must be cheap and easy to use (*like ya mum), hard to break, easy to fix and get spare parts for if required, have a good warranty and be quiet as a mouse. I want to be able to use this thing at 3am and not incur the wrath of my beloved house-mates of whom are not related to me and there-for not obliged to put up with any bullony. According to the web cold pressed slow juicing increases the length of time the juice is fresh and nutrient-full. I want this.
-later in the day-
Looking at ebay, customer reviews and company websites, I’m noticing some issues. Some juicer review sites seem to have been attacked by automated bots. I do not trust the positive ones, and on several juicers those that do give a negative say the same thing: the warranty is useless. If the product breaks in anyway, the company will not get back to you, you will not get a replacement part nor machine, not even a refund. And these are several hundred dollar machines. With pursed lips I continue my search for the perfect juicer.
I honestly have not found a single juicer that I could genuinely get behind and recommend to anyone. That is disappointing, I was expecting this to end with a woohoo new juicer, I shall recommend it to all the populus! But no. Call me over-cautious, but when it comes to spending money I want to be sure of my purchase. A loud and proud juicer owner and good friend has been giving me plenty of juicer purchase horror stories to go with my search. Broke easily, wasn’t very powerful, hard to clean, etc etc. None happened to him of course just his friends, his juicer is the cats pajamas. Perfect in every way. Except for the part where it sounds like a lawn mower somehow got into the house and is running a rampage, like a microphone held up to a 17 year old males car engine, like your ear drums begging for death. And his wife, also a friend, just found it on ebay, auction ending in 15 minutes. Dang.
-not much later-
Personally tested the juicer. It rocks. I want it. I bid on it.
-a few seconds later-
It is mine. Now to wait for it via the snail mail. OH my gosh I just thought, I hope it doesn’t get broken in the mail… Dangit. Well I hope this end wells, that the juicer works, that the juice tastes good, that it doesn’t become a fad, that I find a way to make juice any time I want without becoming a victim of accidental death at 3.15am.
So excited, cannot wait for my juicer 😀
Pfft, diet planning.
*I’m sorry, but the joke was right there, I had to do it.