The Zombie Apocalypse is here! You’re freaking out! They seem to be everywhere, but they walk super slow. You judge you have 5 minutes left in this place in which you are in (maybe your own home, maybe a friends, maybe – god forbid – you’re shitty work place, heck maybe you’re in the supermarket getting groceries, decided to check your wordpress and got this special bulletin and when you looked back up, dammit if it wasn’t true, zombies be everywhere. After 5 minutes however, they will start coming through the entry ways. Within 7 minutes they’ll be in every space of the place.
Naturally you have thought about this before and have already figured out a trusty weapon or two to use when required. You now have the task of grabbing supplies and determining where, if anywhere, you’re going to go from here. Which food, drinks and medicine did you grab? Why those ones? And where to now?
Somewhere with maximum survival opportunity. Where do you go? Remember you’re two key factors here are 1) safety, and b) food (and medicine) supply.
In 3 months time, you are still alive, still doing what you gotta to survive. Where are you, and what does your food supply look like? The Walking Dead prison + garden scenario, The Governors gated commune – with armed people going out to scavenge as required, An army stronghold or a government base, your bomb shelter, go to the Winchester and have a pint whilst waiting for it to all blow over, or boarded up in your own home occasionally risking your life to grab more supplies?
Would a vegan diet be more or less feasible in a zombie apocalypse? Would your diet change and move toward or further away from being plant based? Here are the pros and cons as I see them:
Pro: They’ re technically everywhere. There are cows just down the road from me. Not very well fed cows, but they exist, and if I were so inclined… in Australia we also have snakes, crocodiles, many different fish life (if you choose to stick near the water), we even have many dogs, cats and birds.
Con: They get sick easy. Eating them increases your chances of many diseases and health conditions which have suddenly become a lot harder to help fix, like heart attacks.
Pro: it has protein.
Con: if you have to hunt it, you are actually taking your mind off- not on – what is around you. By hunting another animal you leave yourself vulnerable to attack. Don’t believe me? Then think back a few years to that time a certain vice president shot his lawyer in the face whilst hunting. The reason (he says) this happened is because you’re in the moment, you don’t notice much around you as you focus on the kill. Unless that was a lie and he really just wanted to shoot the guy in the face. He was a lawyer after all. Either way, see how this hunting business could be a bit dangerous?
Con: meat requires cooking to be eaten. That means lighting a fire/using some form of cookeryness that is bound to attract zombies.
Megacon: If a flesh eating zombie curse did break out among the earths populous it seems likely that it happened via food. The most likely food source to cause such an epidemic is meat. Or am I biased here?
Pro: you can store a lot more vegetables when you run than you can meat products – it doesn’t weigh as much. Then once you get there, you can use what you have to cultivate more. Even one bulb would do. It is very difficult to get animals to procreate, and you forget running with Betsy the cow in your hands.
Con: variety of fruit and vegetables would be hard to come by. Eating a salad is boring enough sometimes, imagine being stuck at an onion farm? It’d be enough to make you cry.
Pro: growing fruit and vegetables can be done indoors and quietly, which means it is much safer for those who have settled into a place.
Con: some fruits and vegetables are poisonous. Can you tell which ones which? Because I can’t. Mushrooms might just go off my menu. Sadness.
Pro: They’d make the place smell much nicer. Add a bit of colour.
Pro: can be eaten raw. If you’re in a less than peachy place and cannot cook, this is perfect for getting you through.
EpicPro: fruit and vegetables would not require to eat your food in order to survive too.
Epicpro: fruit and vegetables have more nutrients in them than meat, meaning your body will be harder, better, faster, stronger.
After much consideration over the course of a few hours looking into different zombie movies and TV and how they survived I have decided to remain vegan during the apocalypse.
What do you think? Something I’ve missed? What would you do and what would you eat when the dust is settled and you’re still alive and realised you’re in it for the long haul?
Also, in the event of an Apocalypse, I think I’d put extra care to grab medicine that others find particularly important for their survival, such as asthma medicine and the like. Make it much easier to find a friendly face to barter with or keep new companions alive. At least until people figure out how to use their diet for that.
To making like the Bee Gees,